I started out with nothing and I’ve still got most of it.
Beauty is skin deep, but ugly goes all the way to the bone.
I was so low I could sit on the curb and dangle my feet.
I was so broke that if it took a dollar to go around the world, I couldn’t get out of sight.
The only job I know of where you can start at the top is a well digger.
Q: How many people work for you?
A: Oh, about half of them.
A preacher is paid to be good. His congregation is good for nothing.
The higher up a tree that a baboon climbs, the more he shows his backside.
Where we used to live, you could look up the chimney and see goats grazing on the hillside.
You can’t be two-faced because if you were, you would wear the other one.
The Harpeth River in Franklin got so high one time that you could see under it.
A True Story that happened when I was 10 years old, and one of the best marketing plans I have ever had. A friend of mine (Bear Otey) gave me a pair of Homing Pigeon squabs. A squab is a baby pigeon. I made a nest for them in the barn behind our house. I raised them until they were grown. I would put them in a box and place the box in the basket on my bicycle and peddle as far as I could in Franklin and then let them go and by the time I got home they would be in the barn in their nest. I got to thinking and decided that I could sell them for two dollars a pair to other kids in Franklin. I would tell them to build a nest for them and wait two or three days then let them out for exercise and when they let them out, they would come right back to the nest in my barn (that’s what homing pigeons do). I kept selling those same pigeons over and over again and made $22 before Sam Ragsdale’s mama told my daddy what I was doing and when Daddy got home from work, two things happened:
1. He took my $22.
2. Those two pigeons were a major part of our supper that night.
You could get a job at Walker and Turner… that’s walk a street and turn a corner.
Another True Story. I was working for my dad and asked him if I could get off Saturday to go to the Tennessee/Alabama football game in Knoxville. He said, “Leonard, getting off on Saturday, which is my busiest day, is not your problem. Your problem will be trying to get back in on the following Monday!”
